it's not how many times i've got my heart broken, its not even the person who broke it. what's worst of it all is how i got this wretched pump battered and shot down.
when i have lots of stuff to be done, where i need my strength but my sadness brings me down, my soul always nags at me 'i'm not gonna cheer up for you'. and i am left to fend for myself damaged and tired, trying to improve my life knowing that a fist sized vessel inside me is crying for relief.
the summer heat brings more than the heat of the sun and the sizzle of the humid uv-heavy air. i'm more of a man than i ever thought every time this heat keeps me company. my body responds to the call of heat that the climate brings and the thing is i long to be satisfied even with just a person to be there, a person to hug.
but what am i to wait for? why am i waiting in the first place? what am i to expect from this evil world inhabited by judgement-driven people (just like me)?
and to try to live it with the life i have.
busy and broken.
that's how i am in this summer heat.
i haven't got space for much more.